Another delay

8:00 a.m.
I received an e-mail yesterday that our agency would like 3 more pictures of our whole family unit before we can send HSTK.  I was all about to rush and print them and overnight them because I was really expecting our - CONGRATULATIONS HSTK e-mail this week but in the e-mail our director referenced her vacation next week and that she will look for them upon her return and then we can get it out the following week.  I will be on vacation the following week so I really hope there is nothing else missing.

I just don't understand why when I sent all this back in March they didn't decide then then needed more pictures so there was not a delay now.

I know it is only a week but I just feel so disappointed.  Now we will not be HSTK until July.  I know I'm new to adoption but I just never expected this beginning process to take 6 months.

I know, I know,  all about my title....don't remind me.  I need to feel a little disappointed for a bit then will perk up :)

1:30 p.m.
Maybe good news.  I was hesitant to e-mail and ask if the assistant director could mail our dossier while the director was out but decided to go for it anyway.  One must be their own advocate :)  I received an e-mail saying if I got the new pictures there by Wednesday there is a chance our dossier could go to Korea with another package they were sending out.  If not she promised that it would go out immediately when she returned from vacation.  So I have the new pictures out the door and hoping for the best.  We will be on vacation upon her return with very little access to e-mail.  I am praying they do not need anything else while we are away.

Fun at Hershey Park

Home Study here and sent of to USCIS

To my surprise my home study arrived the day after Barker sent it....YEAH!  I of course rushed off to get it in the mail on Friday a.m.

It is interesting to open an envelope and know that 16 page document that is a summary of your life.   It makes you realize you want that document to be filled with more of what you do for others and your church than what you have acquired.   It is nice to hear the social works say that you house is spacious and warmly decorated, and happy atmosphere with plenty room for a new addition but it is so much more important to have it reflect a life God wants us to live to hear her mention the service we do at church and for our community.  It certainly made me think that if this document had to be written in another 10 years from now I would want it to show growth in our spiritual life not just our material possessions.....good food for thought.

I decided to go with FedEx this round :) not that I don't trust USPS :)   I wanted to overnight it so it would be there on Monday but that would have been a whopping $65 so I decided to go 2 day at $25 (better use of money LOL)

Please pray that this document arrives in Missouri and is matched up with my I600A application (which was sent prior) and also that the boys fingerprints that were taken at the US Embassy in Seoul last week arrive and are match with no problems.....YEAH almost there!!!!

I tried to write this post yesterday and due to internet failure it did not save and I had to rewrite this a.m.  I certainly had my wording better yesterday but the benefit of today is it is Saturday morning and I am sitting on my front porch drinking coffee with my husband and looking at my beautiful flowers.....just wanted to share a picture.

Home study APPROVED!!!

Yeah!!!! Received an e-mail today saying congratulations your homestudy was approved and we will receive it in a few days.

I will be anxiously awaiting for our mail lady for the next few days.....oh hoping it comes by Friday.

One blog or two?

I am always so back and forth on if I should have one blog or two.  I want to journal the adoption and the memories of our life and it would be way easier if I just had one blog but then I do really want to have a blog dedicated to the adoption journey to print for my little boy to read one day so here is what I decided to do.  

I have my family blog where I have posted more pictures and descriptions but I think I will occasionally add a picture or two here as well to sort of show us living our lives during the wait.  I am extremely blessed to have this great family and a wonderful life as I am waiting for my new addition.

Home Study here and reviewed

We received our home study over the weekend - YEAH.  There were several things that needed to edited so I had to send back changes and now we are waiting for those to be accepted and then sent back to us.    Most errors were with name spellings and some simple facts but the most important change was the medical conditions we were willing to be open to for referral were not accurate.

I really struggled with filling out that form originally and it was almost as hard to edit the home study and delete some of the conditions that we decided not to be open to that she had listed.  I do believe that God will send us the right child with only the medical conditions that we will be able to handle but I did know up front that some would require more time from our family than we had.

Hopefully we will get the final back soon.......

In God's time not my own......

I often wonder how many times I will come back to the title of this blog during this journey.   I am sure that God lead me to name this blog as a reminder and a lesson in patience.

Today I was again wondering WHEN WILL THAT HOME STUDY GET DONE.  It has been well over one month since our final home visit.  At the beginning of last week the director the Korea program called me and said she would have it to us to review by the end of last week.

Friday came and went and Monday I thought about e-mailing but no sooner did I really begin to serious craft an e-mail I got an e-mail from the director telling me that on Thursday when she started to review the home study two travel approvals for babies came in and that needed her immediate attention and she has not forgotten us and thanked me for my patience.

I understand, really I do.  If my baby's travel approval arrived I would want them to jump right on that, but here it is Wednesday and I was getting impatient.  So I opened my blog and was ready to type/complain away about how I really just want it to be my turn.  How I want to get that homestudy to Korea so we can begin our official wait and......I saw my blog title.

It is going to be a constant reminder during this journey....a good reminder.  I know there are times that getting things out help but REALLY.  Look how blessed I am.  I am going through this process that for years I assumed was only a dream.  I have two beautiful healthy children that keep me busy, and we are at a place in our lives where we are able to start doing fun things like vacations - other than just camping ;)

I know God has HIS plan and the timing of HSTK is part of it.  I know that potentially if we submit HSTK this month and our referral comes at the approximate time the agency estimates that we could potentially travel in the summer months.  What  a blessing that would be for my daycare.  I will need to close the daycare for a month and a half and to be closed in the summer when summer camps and college students are available would be wonderful for my families and also maybe keep me from loosing some of my kids.

So once again I am thankful I was able to open the blog in a grumpy mood and see the title and take a few minutes to remember this is all -  IN GOD'S TIME NOT  MY OWN!!!!!

Realization that my baby is probably out there

Jeremiah 1:5 – “I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb.”

Yesterday we decided to make a break for the beach so my kids, Ooney and JonJon and one of the most lovely people I know, my niece Sarah who just graduated from college packed up the SUV and headed off.  While on our drive Sarah was asking about the adoption and the time-lines and paused to think it over and she said, "well that means your baby is about to be conceived in a month or so".  I can't believe I have been so busy that I didn't really think about this yet.  

This morning I went onto the facebook group I am part of that is made up of families using our adoption agency and did a little research on those who have traveled recently, when their home studies went to Korean, their travel calls and the age of the babies when they traveled to get them.  I then went on to google calendars and printed out a calendar that went from now to 2014 did the math and assuming that our home study will go to Korea some time next month -  then sure enough our baby was more than likely conceived this month.  Now as everyone who is familiar with adoption process knows this is completely unpredictable anything could happen to the program and cause a delay but still what a thought.....

You start this process and you know you baby is not event born or probably not event conceived and the wait is so long that it just feels endless.  But it feels so much more real now.  

My baby is more than likely out there.  His mother more than likely doesn't know she is even pregnant,  and is about to be faced with the the biggest decisions of her life.  She will more than likely consider abortion and out of love for her baby give him life.  She will be faced with the social shame of pregnancy out of wedlock, faced with the pain of telling her family or if she chooses not to hiding this for months.  She will be faced with the challenges of altering a possible lifestyle that would be unhealthy for the baby she carries....but most of all she will be faced with the pain of seeing her baby after he is born and giving him away. 

She is now part of me.  I feel love for this woman I don't even know and probably never will.  My prayers have begun and will continue.  

Thank you for choosing to give life to this little boy that is yours and will one day be mine.

Ah this is taking so long

I don't want to complain because I do feel so thankful that God worked out the details and we are able to send our home study to Korea (HSTK) without the delay of waiting for the boys to get fingerprinted but  IT IS TAKING FOREVER FOR OUR HOME STUDY TO GET DONE.

We sent out application the very beginning of January and I never expected it to take this long to just get the home study done.   I was thinking like 3-4 months.   I did my part the best I could I gathered all my paperwork and got all our appointments done in 3 weeks....I guess it is just hard to wait for others to do their part.

Feeling better already from the capital letter home study vent and truly am thankful for all God has done to get us to this place.

Light at the end of the tunnel

At the beginning of this week it looked as though we would definitely be delayed in sending HSTK (Home study to Korea)  and now it appears things might have turned around and we may be able to move forward

Earlier this week I received the case number for my I-600 along with the phone number for the adoption department at USCIS.  I made the call hoping for the best and was told that more than likely things would not move forward without the home study.  I felt deflated.  I knew it was a long shot but was really hoping it would work. 

It still might have helped because it takes 10-12 days for the application to go from the processing branch in Texas to adoption office in Missouri and the nice woman who helped me from USCIS gave me the address where I can overnight our home study when that is finalized straight to Missouri so at least we are not wasting time.  Before I would have still been waiting on our home study to be finalized and then send in and wait those 2-3 weeks as it was processed so at least now it is moving to the right places and I can catch my home study up overnight directly to Missouri.

I am hoping that if my home study is finalized and approved within the next two weeks if I overnight it the USCIS branch in Missouri I we might still be able to get the boys prints done before they leave but who knows.  I was told I could call when the home study caught up and they could possibly fax my documents to our local USCIS branch for fingerprinting.

So I was disappointed but then came the good news....

Today my agency called and there may still be a way to move forward while we are waiting on the boys to get printed in Korea.  I feel super happy and hope this works out ok.  With the 2 year wait from when our home study finally goes to Korea I really didn't want to delay almost another 4 more months.

New baby for my baby!

Today I started a new baby at my daycare.  I did not plan to take a new baby, I get so many baby calls and it has gotten easy to say no lately....but after sending the adoption application in and praying God would help us fund this adoption one of the kindergarten teachers stopped me in the hall at school one day and ask me if I had an opening for her baby that was due in a few weeks.  If I ever was going to take a new baby it would have to be a teachers baby so I didn't add more here to my summers and schools out days. I told her I would think about it and they came for a visit. 

I really felt this was God's way of helping us pay for this adoptions so I agreed and here we are.  It is hard work, very hard work, but I work hard for Banana and Carrot so I feel like out new baby will be worth the hard work.

I was not feeling confident this a.m. since I did not know his schedule but am feeling like I have this now.  I have successfully fed this new little guy two bottles and he ate them all and he is on his 3rd nap. He will be here for 5 weeks then back home with his mama for the summer and back in the fall which will be perfect because then my two preschooler girls will be in school and it will just be the baby and a 2 year after the before and afterschool kids get on the bus....ideal.

I am truly thankful God has heard our prayers and has sent us part of the answer by sending this baby to help finance the adoption.....it also helps that this baby is so cute :)

I600A sent early....will it work?

After the home study the next step is to apply for an I-600A which is the application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition.  This is suppose to be sent along with some identification documents and the completed home study.  They then assign you a case number and send you appointments for FBI fingerprinting at your local USCIS office (both of which are 45 minutes away)

We do not have a completed home study report yet and probably won't until close to the end of May which then will not allow time for JonJon and Ooney to get fingerprinted before they leave for Korea so here is what I am attempting to do.

I have sent in our application with a cover letter explaining the situations about the boys returning to Korea for the summer along with everything but the home study.  I state that the home study would follow ASAP in late May or early June and I ask them if they would please send the boys for their biometrics appointments before they leave.....please pray this works. 

I know this is a long shot and I understand I may need to wait....but I don't want too.  I know I'm in for such a long wait as it is after HSTK I want to do what I can now to just get to that point.

A very nice woman at the USCIS department sugguested I try this.  What will happen is they will get my documents and must assign it a case number.  After that it would really just sit until they get all the paperwork but with the case number I am then allowed to call the adoption department and petition them to print the boys and hold the prints until the home study follow.

So we will see what happens.  I know God has a special little boy out there for me and if there is a delay it was meant to be so that I was match with the little guy He wanted me to mother, but my mamma's heart wants to do what it can now to move things along as fast as I can because I really feel that a 3 month delay on top of an already 24 month wait will hurt a little.

Thank you friend

A big thank you to my good friend who missed her son's baseball game to do our reference interview.  I know that was a sacrifice to miss seeing your son's game.  I am very thankful for your friendship.

The language of friendship is not words but meanings. ~Henry David Thoreau

Final home study visit

Our final home study visit is complete!  I forgot to ask our social worker permission to post this so I will just block her out ;)

 It feels so wonderful to have crossed that milestone.  One step closer to HSTK (home study to Korea).  HSTK is when all of these months of work are compiled and sent to Korea so we can begin our official count down.

The visit went well.  The sw ask the kid if they were excited about the adoption and the things they would look forward to doing with their new brother or sister which prompted a quick reply from Banana saying, " wait a minute I thought we were getting a brother" LOL.  I reminded him that there was a very small possibility that it could be a girl and we moved forward.  The kids then showed her their rooms and the rest of the house.

The SW did ask if the deer hanging in our basement was in fact a deer. She had a bit of a look of horror on her face and ask J if "he did that". It was pretty amusing. I think when listing the J's hobbies I put fishing and golf since he has not had as much time for hunting lately so maybe she was just surprised.

She then interviewed our two international students and finished off us.

All in all it went very well although she did deliver some pretty disappointing news that the timing of the finalization of the home study would allow for sufficient time to send our I-600A application (next step) in time to get fingerprint appointments for the boys before they return to Korea for the summer.  This would mean a significant delay.

So some investigating I did :) which I will save for another post........

Why The Apple Pie?

Our final home study interview (the home visit) is scheduled for tomorrow.  At first this was scheduled for the first week of April and the social worker called me the Friday night before and with short notice I was ok with things not being perfect.

Since the visit was rescheduled to this week and I had a nice long rainy Sunday things are "almost perfect" right down to the apple pie I made this moring to serve our social worker.  I know that things don't need to be perfect.   I have heard everyone say  "oh they don't look that close at the house - don't worry about it", and we really like our social worker and I truly "feel" it does not need to be perfect.

This morning while I was making "my speciality" homemade apple pie and I was spending so much extra time on the crust, slicing the apples just so,  and preparing the crumb  topping in nice fine crumbs instead of my normal rush rush rush lumpy sugar clumps - I kept questioning WHY THE APPLE PIE?

Why did I feel the need to make my "best" dessert.  I fully understand it didn't matter.  It takes some time to make apple pie from scratch and I kept pondering that thought - why the apple pie.

I only make apple pie on occasion because it takes so very long but I like to make it for my family because they all love it and they know how long it takes me to make it and I make it because I love them.

As the pie was baking I realized I wasn't spending the time making everything perfect for the social worker but it was out of love for my new baby.  I want it to be perfect for him because I love him already.  I love this little person who has only been a wish in my heart for the past 10 years while I have prayed my husband would come around to the adoption idea.

So why the apple pie?  It is for you my little boy who I can't wait to meet and I hardly know how I am going to put in the long months upcoming waiting for your referral and then to meet you but you are worth the apple pie.

My homestudy interview was almost like a date :)

We took the long 2 hour drive again for my personal home study interview.  J came along so I would not need to drive home alone in the dark.  My interview went well - I think.  I always struggle with those questions like describe yourself in 3 words :)

We finished up sooner than we expected and called home to check on the kids who were already both asleep.  Since we had not eaten dinner and the adoption agency is on the outskirts of the city we decided to try one of the many restaurants we saw close by. 

We walked down the street and narrowed it down to a Japanese place, a Louisiana style restaurant and this little Italian restaurant that we choose and I'm glad we did.  It was completely adorable inside.  Murals on the walls and twinkle lights made it really cozy. 

It was after 8:00p.m. so it was not really crowded but there were two other couples.  One probably recently married and all excited talking about their life and another older couple who must have been on a first date.  It was so funny and I was thankful for my husband and how we are at the place in our lives were we are comfortable with our relationship could just relax and eat our dinner.

We enjoyed our time alone together and had a nice little dinner....next step.  Home visit on Thursday.

Found my Globe

I saw this globe in a local antique store a few weeks back but there was no price on it.  I ask the shop owner who called the owner of the globe and she said it was $55 dollars but if I paid cash it would be 20%off.  I decided to hold off and wait to get the extra off.  I went back to the store last Sunday after church and there was a price tag on it for $70.  I was about to walk out but decided to ask about it since I was given a different  price before. 

I woman called me back and said that the owner would sell it to me for the lower price so I ended up getting it for $42 instead :)  It always pays to ask.

Projects!

I have been wanting to sort of journal our adoption journey in our house so I have started this project.  I found this card holder on-line and thought it would be perfect so I ordered it for Jeff to give to me as a birthday present LOL

 I am planning to add different pictures and dates along the journey

 I want to get an entry way table to go under this but this will do for now. There is an old vintage world globe at a local antiques store I want to pick up for below or eventually on my new table top.

 I silhouette of Korea with a Bible verse inside.

This was a fun little project and I will update with more pictures as it progresses. 

Sa-lang Hae (I love you) J!

Today J took the long journey for his individual interview.  He is so busy and I know he did not really have the time to take off work for this. He has been so supportive in this home study process. 
J has certainly had his worries in the past about how we would afford this adoption and I sort of expected him to hem-and-haw a little with all these expenses and steps this home study has required but he has been great.  He has had to spend hours gathering financial information, spending nice Saturday's getting fingerprinted,  writing his autobiography, writing checks :) and he has done these without complaining at all (for the most part).

He even came home today and was talking about some reading we will need to do to prepare for this new little person.  He is totally in this now and I don't just feel like he is doing this for me.  I know this adoption has meant giving up a lot of potential "fun items" he had hoped to purchase. I know this adoption is such a time commitment along with the commitment to parent again and the time that takes.

Thank you J for the sacrifices you make for God, for me, and for our children - present and future.

I love you!

Thankful for a good friend

Today I am feeling thankful for friends.  It was very encouraging yesterday when out of the blue I got an e-mail from a friend who was listening to the song "one less" by Matthew West and decided to e-mail me.  The e-mail was short and sweet telling me that she heard the song and was thinking of us and if we got discouraged with all the paperwork to listen to the song and remember how important this adoption is.  This is just what I needed to help me get through this very long week.

Thank you my friend for being my friend and your encouragement and support.  I know we don't see each other very much but you will always be my best friend.

Pause my playlist at the bottom and you can listen to the song via the link below
http://youtu.be/8nqrvkNywcY

Artist: Matthew West
 

There's a child, been abandoned out on the street
Now she's waiting for someone to be her miracle
There's a wife somewhere halfway around the world
Begging God for a little girl she can call her own

Well, worlds collide and colors fade
And a man and wife brought their little girl home today

And there's one less, one less
One less broken heart in the world tonight
Yeah, there's one less, one less
There's one less broken heart in the world tonight

We are called to the widows and the orphans
But it's easy to ignore their silent cries
Oh, but every single time somebody reaches into the darkness
Makes a choice to help the helpless, we let mercy save a life

And there's one less, one less
And there's one less broken heart in the world tonight
Yeah, there's one less, one less
Yeah, there's one less broken heart in the world tonight

Well, the truth is we are all the orphans
But love has left the 99 just to find the one

So let worlds collide, colors fade
Let your life be the miracle today, whoa

One less, one less
One less broken heart in the world tonight
Tonight I know there's one less, one less
There's one less broken heart in the world tonight, yeah

One less night alone
One less child without a home
One less birthday gone forgotten
One more soul rising from the bottom

One less night alone
One less child without a home
One less birthday gone forgotten
One more soul rising from the bottom

One less, one less
There's one less broken heart in the world tonight